A question I get asked frequently is why do you take so much time off in March? Most people then go on to tell me that I shouldn’t focus on March 8th and that I should treat every day as a normal day. Obviously these people have not lost children and don’t really understand my reasoning. This blog is about answering that question and not about having a go at them. I really do hope I get to the point where I can drastically reduce the amount of time off I have in March but it isn’t the right time and my life isn’t at the point where reducing the time off I have is safe.
As I am writing this I am currently using multiple methods to try and ground myself. I have had a major flashback which came on unexpectedly and with non of the usual warning signs and triggers. It was bad enough for me to loose track of reality. This is also not one that I am used to or had before. It happened on the bus on the way home I am glad no one was about to see me rapidly turn into a quivering mess. I have managed to get home without letting on what has happened. Had I been at work I would have had to go home meaning more sickness and possibly trouble for me. It would have also drawn allot of attention to me which is something I don’t want.
I am not going to talk about what actually happened in the flashback as I think it is to graphic/upsetting to be talked about on here. Also I don’t want to trigger a bigger or worse flashback even with me being in the safety of my home. You will also have forgive me if I am not very responsive online for today as these can take a while to get fully under control.
{{{hugs}}}
ReplyDelete