Sunday

I am sure I have posted this tweet before but I feel the need to post it again;

The problem with trying to be a perfectionist on a card that is never going to be opened is that it will always end up in tears.

Well this weekend I bought the card again, the methods I use this time are only a dry run for the fully justifiable hell that I put myself through in March.  It is pointless of me saying I need a hug when I know that it isn't going to happen. 

I really don't know what else to say so for now I am going to sign off.

Sorrow surrounds me

xxxx

Pussy Riot

Okay before we go any further with today's blog I would humbly like to point you to the paragraph below the blog title.  For any avoidance of doubt please read it so we can save any misunderstandings and potential embarrassment.  Here is the paragraph just to make sure;

Thoughts, opinions, musings and ramblings of a dragon. Naturally anything published by me in this blog represents my views and not of my employer, family, friends, people that I have slept with or anyone I may have come into contact with on a daily basis. Any comments posted by people who read this blog are their own opinions, they do not represent me etc.

Now let's talk about Pussy Riot who have been sent to prison for two years for hooliganism in Russia. I think 99.9% of us believe this is wrong.  Personally I fully believe that when the state fails then non violent civil disobedience is fully justifiable.  There should be separation between the church, state and judiciary. Especially between the state and judiciary.  I fully believe and call for their immediate release!

This for me isn't about feminism it is about freedom of speech, holding the state to account and the right to protest. Their methods are unique I must admit. I respect their stance and the fact that they are prepared to fully accept responsibility for their actions.  I hope they endure and survive their  Incarceration.

Naturally on twitter there has been numerous reports of other protests around the world. We had the fully expected arrests in Russia. In the Ukraine we had one feminist group decide to stage a protest by cutting down a religious monument (Jesus on a cross).  I can't agree with their protest regardless of their reasons, what puzzles me is their methods and what their methods have got to do with feminism.  A good looking topless women using a chain saw and allot of effort to cut the cross down with free pussy riot on her body.

http://gawker.com/5935685/topless-femen-activist-takes-down-giant-cross-with-chainsaw-to-protest-pussy-riot-verdict?utm_campaign=socialflow_gawker_twitter&utm_source=gawker_twitter&utm_medium=socialflow 

I understand and support women's rights. Though I have to ask what has this got to do with feminism? Was the nudity for a reason? I am trying to understand what is going on here.

Useless Human.

I am back at work, yay! I can stop feeling like such a completely useless human being now. I find that there is nothing quite like being off work with mental health issues to increase that feeling of failure and being useless. It doesn’t start straight away with me; normally I am to busy trying to calm my brain down enough to focus on basic day to day activities and getting me out of the house. It gets me in the end though to the point where I don’t want to look people in the eye and feel like I should apologise for not being able to cope. Add in the fact that I am going to loose wages, potentially upset my employer and the fact that I can’t do quite a number of the things that I would normally do and you have quite a boiling pot of a mess to deal with.


I feel that I should point out that none of us can help being ill regardless of whether it is physical, mental or a combination of both that we have. Likewise I had no choice but to off sick and I had got to the point that I couldn’t cope. I had put up a vicious fight but in the end I had to go off and accept the consequences of my actions. I am not happy about it but I am not going to apologise for something that is out of my control.

This time I managed to deal with things better and quicker which has meant that I have kept my time off to a minimum. I did everything I could to identify the cause and to get myself back to work. The method I used in the end was to accept that everything bad that has ever happened to me was entirely my fault (The reality being extremely different to this). The theory being that if everything was my fault then there was only one person who could deal with it and that was me.

Once I had got to this point I managed to get things moving very quickly to the point that I was able to make the decision to go back to work. The first positive consequence of this is that I can stop feeling like such a useless human being now.